How we pray and what we pray for has a massive impact on our lives. So often we pray for what we want. Maybe we want a new job. So we pray and pray “Please Please Please Lord, let me get this new position at work.” We pray fervently for what we want. We think we know what we want and need. We also ask for things we think we have to have, like new cars, new house, and new stuff. The problem is not necessarily that we don’t need those things; the problem is often with our own contentment. So we pray selfishly for the things we think we need, because we have convinced ourselves that what we have is not sufficient. Often we have what we need but not always what we want. Prayer becomes a completely acceptable way to get what we want.
Like we have been taught we send our prayers up, believing God will answer and give us what we so desperately want. And so maybe the Lord gives what we asked for, even though it is not best for us. The job we so desperately wanted turns out to be a nightmare of long hours and difficult work. The new car we had to have is causing tremendous financial strain and the joy we found in it is gone because the stress is overwhelming. This concept is a scary one to me. I can think of prayers I pray that are self-serving. I’m not asking for what God wants but for what I want.
I’ve been trying to investigate my own prayer life, how often do I ask for something based on how the Lord has led me versus based on what I want for myself. It’s an important question. Sometimes God gives His people what they ask for but not what they truly need.
In 1 Samuel 8, we hear the people of Israel complaining because they want a king like everyone else. They ask Samuel who in turn asks God and He tells them “no.” They persist in their prayers again and God gives them a king. Basically, they wanted a king, so they begged God, in fact they insisted, and God allowed them to have what they said they wanted. God answered them with a “Yes”. The story continues and God has Samuel anoint Saul and things start out ok, but we know the end of the story. Saul turns away from the Lord and the people of Israel suffer because of their earthly king. God answered them with a yes but it was not His best for them.
The Israelites also complained in the wilderness because they were tired of manna and they missed meat. Things were so much better in Egypt they mourned. This made God angry because they did not have contented hearts so He gave them what they said they wanted. In Numbers 11 it says that they will have so much quail “until it be loathsome to you.” They wanted meat so the Lord gave it to them, yet it did not make them happy. He said “Yes” to their want but in the end it caused more pain than their previous state.
It seems from these examples that sometimes the Lord answers our prayers with a yes and we suffer because of it. Sometimes it is how we learn a lesson. This is petrifying to me.
How many times have I been fervent, almost demanding in prayer waiting on God to say “Yes.” Sometimes, God does say no because He knows what we need. In our humanity we cannot see what the Sovereign God wants for us.
While I found this study to be troubling, I find comfort as well. At times we do not know what to pray for we can pray for wisdom. James tells us that he gives wisdom liberally to those who ask and believe the Lord to do give it. Wisdom from the Lord will lead us in the right direction.
Recently, God answered a prayer with a “No” in my own life. This “no” came about 4 days after I had started studying this topic. I was so thankful that instead of continuing down a path God didn’t have for me that I could pause and ask for wisdom.
